almost 30 years ago.
Have you tried craigslist for a car? They may have something for you that
you could plate and insure pretty cheaply.
As for the test 2 weeks with no news is good news in my book, in my mind bad
news almost always comes immediately!
On Sun, Mar 9, 2008 at 8:10 AM, Stephanie L. Carter <ladycinna@comcast.net>
wrote:
> Hello everyone,
>
> My family is quite use to me experiencing a little bit of depression
> during
> the month of March, I mean, after all, I was a Daddy's girl, and even
> after
> 16 years, it still hurts to remember the day we lost him (March 14th) and
> then his birthday (March 15th), and there is also the fact that my
> favorite
> uncle's birthday was on the 8th and my aunt, who passed away last year's
> birthday was on the 21st, as well as my deceased step-son, who although he
> gave me SO much trouble when he was alive, I still love and miss him.
>
> But that's only ½ the problem. Since I don't get around very well and our
> vehicle was repossessed, I haven't seen my mother since January. I haven't
> been able to attend any of her doctor's appointments or procedures because
> my brother is too busy to pick me up before they go. I feel in my heart
> this
> is his way of shutting me out. Which only made it worse because on the
> 7th,
> I did as a younger sister is suppose to do and called and wished him a
> Happy
> Birthday.
>
> I listen to Mom when she comes back from the appointments and I hear the
> fear in her voice. She just had the 'scope' test (I can't remember the
> medical term) where they went down her throat to biopsy her liver to see
> if
> what they see is more cancer. It's been two weeks and we've heard nothing.
> And all it does is scare me even more. I sit here trapped in the house by
> my
> illnesses, lack of vehicle, lack of finances and lack of friends and
> worry.
> The more I worry, the worse I feel and the less I feel that I can tell
> anyone the truth. I've never experienced the process of cancer, because
> the
> family members that have died from cancer all hid it from me (especially
> my
> dad) until there was nothing else to be done.
>
> I knew that I had gone just about as far into this depression as I could
> when I couldn't bring myself to get up to go to church this morning. I
> wanted to, but I just couldn't. Now I'm sitting here feeling stupid and
> hoping that God understands. I'm letting tears flow that I've been holding
> back for a while now because everyone tells me that I have to be strong.
> I'm
> strong with some things. I do okay that we don't have a vehicle, I even do
> okay with the fact that the house has been foreclosed and we have just a
> few
> months to find somewhere to live, but the fear of losing my mother is
> starting to get to me. It's like I've forgotten all the little things that
> are wrong with our relationship (uh, with me being Daddy's little girl; my
> brother has always been Momma's boy) because I'd rather have her here
> irritating me than be without her. It gets so bad sometimes that I have to
> rush myself off the phone with her because I don't want her to hear me
> crying and I know that I wouldn't be able to lie to her about what's
> wrong.
>
> Things are looking a little better. My daughter has a vehicle now, of
> course, since she doesn't think in advance, it's sitting in my backyard
> because while she had enough money to buy it, she can neither insure it or
> put plates on it. And I'm in no position to help her out. I guess I just
> needed somewhere to unload this. I have thought about talking with my
> Pastor, but since he's still basically staying with us, it's a little hard
> to pull him aside and talk privately (his fiancé is here much of the
> time).
>
> Well, I've ragged your eyes long enough. I'm praying for you all and ask
> that you pray for me.
>
> Stephanie in Detroit
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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