her if you can. Try to stay as positive as possible and if she is up to it make plans to do things like going to movies or the park with the family to help her keep her mind of of the cancer.
My prayers are with you and your mom and family. I hope that your mom is able to tolerate her treatment and pray she is able to get back in to remission.
Tiffany
Stephanie <stephieshouse@yahoo.com> wrote:
Hello, my name is Stephanie. I am new to the group but not new to
cancer. My mom has been a cancer survivor for the past 20 years. She
was first diagnosed with Breast cancer when I was 14, my sister was 3
and my brother was 2. They do not remember her before cancer was a
part of her life. I barely do to be honest....its getting harder to
remember. I am 34, married with two children of my own. My mom had a
mastectomy when she was 34 after waiting to long to go to the doctor
after detecting a lump. She has had two other bouts and two
experimental rounds of chemo, one of which almost killed her before
she went into remission. She has been in remission for 7 years this
time and she is now at the battlefields again. Stage 4. The breast
cancer has moved into her lungs. She has large tumors and its making
it difficult for her to breath. This is making it hard on me as I
have asthma and my biggest fear is dieing gasping for my last breath.
I so don't want that to be the way my mom dies. I have been having
huge anxiety over this lately. She has been in the hospital a lot in
the last few weeks. They did a procedure to keep her lungs from
filling with fluid over and over again. She started chemo
Tuesday...three types at the same time. They are hitting her hard.
She has been in bed since. Every part of her hurts. She knew what to
expect but you never really know until your right in the middle of it
even if you have been there before....she is depressed and doesn't
want to do it again. I am torn between being selfish and wanting her
to keep fighting so she will be with us longer and saying its okay to
let her go. I am not ready to let her go but its hurting so much to
see her like this. My husband reminded me that the last time she
started chemo it was the same. The first week was turmoil for all of
us and then with all of our help she pulled herself out of bed. I
keep thinking what if she isn't strong enough this time, what if she
feels there is no reason to fight. Last time she wanted to be here to
see her grand-babies...we have all had children now. I am just not
ready for her to not be here. My sister just got engaged today to the
man she has been with for two years. They set a date for next year.
Mom has wanted to see all her children be married...do you think that
will be reason for her to stay strong?
This time its so much more difficult for me to deal with. I want to
stay strong for everyone but I don't think I can. I am going to need
you guys.
thanks for listening.
Steph
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